


anywhere can be a makeout spot if you try hard enough

by bethcaves



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, M/M, Panic Attacks, Post-Recall, Pre-Fall of Overwatch, jesse just wants to be friends
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-12
Updated: 2017-02-12
Packaged: 2018-09-23 16:20:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,248
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9665261
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bethcaves/pseuds/bethcaves
Summary: McCree has never been in a vicinity of high school education in his life. He had never experienced anything beyond a handful of daffodils with crumbled stems held way too tightly in his toddler hand, or a rushed peck forcefully given to the queen of his grade school class. He remembered snippets like these. Other than that, moments lost to his late childhood, when he no longer came home to a family. He was normal back then. Normal. Thinking of pretty girls and their braids, pretty girls and their puffy dresses.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [yildraws](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=yildraws).



> 'Be gentle, it'm my first time.' I say as I consciously delay myself from finishing this thing the way i wanted to and now it's really just a watered down version of the amazing 'blackwatch days' fics that are out there. Despite this I really do hope I managed to deliver on the prompts. 
> 
> This is a gift for the lovely yildraws!  
> I loved all the prompts, but I chose the two easier to write and slapped it together in a messy timline.   
> I hope you enjoy as i do your comic strips that I happen adore. Happy Valentine's day <33

Jesse kept marching around his room. He picked up a crumpled shirt there, found a crucial mission report under a soda can here. His hands trembled on a few occasions if he lets his thoughts loose.

‘Are you doing anything? I'm pretty sure couples do celebrate Valentine’s Day in Japan. They’re big on chocolates I think. You should really check it out, you know, what if Genji is really, really into it and you don’t give him anything. That, that would be bad.’ Hana’s voice is mocking him, tormenting him. Jesse didn’t ever have to think about stuff like this. His lifestyle did not allow him to have someone to be romantic with. Hardly to celebrate occasions like this with. Never this.  
-  
Shimada was an enigma. He was an angry child one moment and took him by storm the next. His unpredictability could be directly applied to their relationship. On Genji’s whims they were either nothing or everything to each other. The firsts were just angry, rude and spiteful. Genji wanted to burn the world, he wanted everyone to suffer with him. After that he was numb. Jesse hardly ever got anything out of him when he was full of rage, now it was impossible. He ignored everyone. The commands he did follow, but he never assured anyone he would. He was mute to all. Morrison, Reyes and Angela, let alone to someone like Jesse who he had no sort of professional obligation to.

They were war buddies, one could say. Not many chances to even run into each other. Jesse was Blackwatch, Genji was Overwatch. Genji was somehow better than Mccree in every way one could imagine, and yet they seemed to subconsciously gravitate towards each other if there was a chance.

Subconsciously Jesse’s ass, he always pushed a teammate or two to the side to stand next to Genji, and Genji did see, at least after the first four times he did, and never distanced himself. Even on his worst days, and there were many, he never seemed to push Jesse away. They exchanged some banter over weapons, some over tactics, nothing committing. Baby steps, Jesse told himself.  
-  
Jesse sat in the cafeteria, it was run by no one in particular these days. His datapad in his hand he solemnly skimmed through articles desperately explaining Japanese customs based on an weirdly insincere american festivity. He nearly threw the device on the table with a deep exhale and spun his neck in a vain attempt to loosen up those old muscles of his. Genji wouldn’t want this. No way. Mccree was sure if Genji is into Valentine’s he’d want both of them to stick to their thing. Genji would do whatever they made of this in Japan, Mccree should the good ol’ American shtick. Whatever that was.

Mccree has never been in a vicinity of high school education in his life. He had never experienced anything beyond a handful of daffodils with crumbled stems held way too tightly in his toddler hand, or a rushed peck forcefully given to the queen of his grade school class. He remembered snippets like these. Other than that, moments lost to his late childhood, when he no longer came home to a family. He was normal back then. Normal. Thinking of pretty girls and their braids, pretty girls and their puffy dresses.

His hands sunk into his hair and tugged hard before ruffling it mercilessly. Moments before Lena strutted by with a bowl of cereal and unsatisfying information that she’s not extremely keen on participating, but even if she was. they were all way too busy to late around at home instead of giving our hands here.  
-  
Home. Jesse was in his own world, the transport threw him around occasionally. He kept staring at the flooring, barely blinking. The mission they were coming from was nothing out of the ordinary, really. It was his first time coming back to Route 66 though. He wasn’t missing outlaw life awfully, on the contrary, but the sneaky claws of nostalgia and what ifs got to him anyways. Questions plaguing every second of his life, past and future.

He ends up doing the exact same thing at the base, he sits in a rec room, he’s sure there are other people around, but he refuses to acknowledge them. Genji says that’s the reason he started talking to him, from his own initiative that is.

‘You’re not doing everything humanly possible to annoy me, so I figured something’s wrong.’ Back then Jesse didn’t feel like being friendly or kind. He didn’t have the energy to be Genji’s ad for a happy and fulfilling life despite everything. He didn’t respond. They sat in silence until sundown.  
-  
Shimada is no longer Shimada, neither is he an enigma. He is Genji and he is more of a puzzle. He wants to be figured out. Jesse has something that he uses as if it were that key they put on the packaging. Before Genji was Genji, he thought it would be his former self. Now Jesse knew it was Genji here and now. Genji on his better days, or more accurately, moments. Mccree was there for most of them and indulges in that knowledge proudly. 

Jesse’s promised to himself that he would not, under any circumstance, do something stupid. Absolutely not an option. That’s probably why he purposely twists circumstances in his favor for none other than spending time with Genji. Frankly, it kind of kept him up at night, so to say the very least, he does have a conscience. It doesn’t stop him from sneaking hard alcohol into the base, or from stealing an actual horse that one time. Is this how he normally behaves? It might as well be to outsiders.

Genji always laughs. Not at him, he assures. But then again what does Jesse really know about Genji. To him it seems the other is appreciating his clumsy way of making friends. On the other hand Genji was a ruin. Mccree could not relate even if he wanted to, so he kept making shots in the dark. He made Genji watch movies, talk about cereal brands and insisted he rode the aforementioned stolen horse.  
It all WAS stupid, but not like this. They just ran away. For some fucking reason. Jesse knew his friend isn’t something that could slip out of the hands of Overwatch, neither was he. And they both actively realized it, so what were they doing.

They ran away from a military base. Agents needed a permission for outings nearby, obviously Genji wouldn’t be granted one, and as for Jesse… Jesse didn’t much care for authorities.  
‘You acted so, just, bitchy, when i borrowed a goddamn horse, but now you made me do this? What kinda backwards logic is that?’

Genji ignored him, leaning his forehead against the window and kept on tracing him fingers over every material the car was made out of.

‘Shut UP! First of all, you said it was for me so don’t act like it’s so out of this world that I wanted to keep it. And secondly, I hardly believe stealing pets is really the worst thing you’ve ever done.’ Jesse imagined a sour smirk on his face. IF he knew what his face looked like, which he didn’t. 

‘It was a joke. Do you know what these are?’ Jesse asked as if Genji was the most gullible thing he ever came to meet. Genji scoffed and returned to his window. Jesse didn’t feel in his element here and with Genji by his side? He was like a mine, the subtlest pressure could set him off and halted communication for weeks. Jesse couldn’t empathize but he understood.

‘You know I don’t know much about you. I’d like to, but I don’t. So I’m sorry if I fuck up with something I say.’

‘I know.’ Genji’s head turns to him. Obviously Jesse doesn’t know nothin’ about his head or his face and maybe not even that much about Genji himself, but he senses a somber and content tone to him at that moment.

‘Jesse, I also know that I may never have another moment like this.’ It used to be McCree-san this and McCree that.

And then he’s holding Genji’s bitingly cold hand in his own, and telling him he’s wrong. They can’t hold someone down like this.You’re the proof of that, Genji retorts They have been on this roundabout ride more or less since they started talking.

‘Besides it’s not like I could just pack my bags and go live a civilian life.’  
‘What are you on about?’ Genji pulls his knees under his chin in a somehow childish gesture.

‘As if I could, Jesse, as if I could go down some street.’ McCree smirks to himself.  
‘Gen, I know what you’re trying to say is all about yourself and how you see it, but come on, you have no idea how the world works.’ Jesse says this more dismissively than he wanted, and is aware this could escalate into an argument before it leaves his mouth.

‘You're just two years older.’ His tone is laced with hurt and arrogance. Jesse finds it funny. ‘It’s not like you’re wisdom itself.’ Genji says it with stone cold seriousness and he himself has to laugh. 

 

‘Yeah, I’m hardly that… and yet’ Jesse says matter of factly with a smile. He rests his hand on the steering wheel. ‘We should go back, maybe no one noticed we’re gone.’ He didn’t like the idea of going back once the night falls. All the bases were either self-sufficient or in the least well supplied so Jesse didn’t bother with wandering the surroundings. Let alone in the radius that reached their current location. His memory was the only thing getting them back tonight and the dark wouldn’t do it any favours.

He hears a hiss to his right and immediately does everything not to look there. For some reason the situation scares the living hell out of him. Genji breathes shakily next to him. The car door opens and he hears Genji step out. Jesse continues looks out of his window stubbornly. Genji sits back down.

‘Doctor Ziegler told me not to do this, you know.’ The reflex to look at him while he speaks is stopped halfway as Jesse anchors it on the steering wheel.  
‘Do what?’

‘She said the scars are sensitive or something of the sort, I did not care to listen at that point. I have not felt wind or the sun in too long.’ Genji laughs and it has a hint of mystery in it. His voice is shaking when he spoke.

Jesse looked at him now. Genji was sitting sideways with his legs on the ground and held his head between his knees. Jesse forgot all about keeping his distance and immediately started stroking his back to provide the tiniest bit of comfort. His hand kept rising and falling with Genji’s laboured breathing. Jesse kept quiet. He had nothing to say to improve the situation. 

‘Genji?’ The raggedness of his breathing went away after a few minutes. He sat up and limply fell against the seat. Jesse’s hand awkwardly shifts to his shoulder and rests there. Jesse is kind of awkwardly leaning over the gap between the seats. ‘Can I do something? Genji, please, talk to me.’ He thought he was tough, but the cyborg keeps disproving him every second spent together. Genji’s head moves a fraction to acknowledge him and sighs.

‘Jesse, why do you care about me? Look at me. It must be exhausting.’

‘I guess it is. You’re not making it easy with the attitude.’ God, shut up! ‘I care ‘cause you’re my friend. Even if you weren’t I wouldn’t like you moping around my workplace so I’d stick my nose into your business anyways. I’m a cool guy like that.’ Jesse was really, really treading water here. Genji has blown up at him before when he tried to comfort him and their relationship was nowhere strong enough to withhold this pattern in some way that could be considered healthy. Jesse was always low-key worried about not saying something to tick the other off. A quiet little laugh came from Genji.

‘You are an oddity.’ Genji says as he turns to him. Just like that. Jesse swallows and tries to be subtle about it. Tries to act casual.

It’s nothing gruesome. His face is unnaturally pale and the scars tracing it even more so. Jesse smiles to himself. ‘As if everyone around here weren’t.’ 

‘The commanders seem like normal people.’ Genji sounds like he really thinks about it.

‘Whatever.’ Jesse pushes him teasingly and finally changes his position to something more natural. Genji is smiling. He’s smiling and Jesse’s chest feels tight. ‘Don’t be mean.’ Genji gasps theatrically.

‘I’d never. That was a compliment.’ Liar. He’s mean all the time. Much less than when he came to them, but still. Genji sits normally, and sprawls his legs as much as possible in a vehicle. ‘I am going to be honest. I am thankful for you, I can’t imagine what I’d do without you. I know how hard it must be. I know how I get. I just… I just want you to know that I’m sorry.’

‘Yeah, I’m gonna stop you right there.’ Genji opens his mouth and is cut off. ‘Gen, stop thinking about me, okay? Don’t get me wrong, it’s really annoying and all the way you can be. You can really hit the spot and it hurts, okay? But I get it. You have to get over yourself first to think about others I suppose. The least I can do is to let you lash out.’

Genji’s mouth is in a crooked line and Jesse can see his chin is shaking slightly. Jesse hates it, absolutely hates it. He grabs Genji’s shoulders. A tear spills over his waterline when he tries to blink it away. Jesse is dumb enough to touch his face without warning as he wipes it away and holds Genji’s face in place gently.

‘You’re gonna be ok? I’ll help you. You can worry about me when I’m fucked up, ok?’Genji covers his hands with his own and nods. ‘Fine.’ They’re quiet after that. Genji presumably basks in the warmness Jesse emits. Or the contact. His eyes are closed and his face is relaxed.

‘Jesse.’ He averted his gaze to the print on Genji’s hoodie but it’s right back up now. His eyes open slowly, a stubborn eye contact is established between them. McCree does the stupid thing. He said he wouldn’t, but he does it anyway. How could he not. He leans forward.

Their noses bump and as intoxicating as that is, it also brings Jesse into reality. He distances himself, just an inch, but Genji goes after him and Jesse gives up. He’s feeling way too much. Genji grips his shoulder lightly and leads him closer with a slight pressure. Jesse can feel his upper lip is split on the right side. He can feel the bumps of the scars on his cold cheeks.

Jesse knows himself and Jesse also knows he’s ridiculously close to falling in love. Jesse is just stupid that way. Genji pulls away slightly.

‘Your hands are rough.’ He says, barely above a whisper. Jesse has no idea whether that’s an insult, a compliment or an observation.

‘Your face is wet.’ He retorts and Genji’s hands shoot up to his face and he starts rubbing his cheek with a sleeve. Jesse receives this bashful look he’d never imagine on Genji, and realizes Genji chose him, Jesse McCree, to see him. That probably made Jesse a judge in this instant. He stops thinking and instead does whatever his mushy feelings want him to. Leaning forward once again, he places his lips upon the recently damp skin and tells Genji to calm down.

He does, or he seems to in the least. His lean metal fingers find Jesse’s left hand and keep a light hold of it. Genji kisses him once more. Light, and gone way too fast.

‘Can we go home?’ Jesse is taken by surprise by that. Not because of the request but the word choice.

‘Nothing’s holding me here besides you.’ Jesse shrugs and straightens up in his seat. Genji steps out again, walks around a bit. Faces the sun that has somehow stayed up to this very moment and skittishly jogs back to face Jesse who is watching him over the roof, arm resting on top of the door and the other holding a cigarette.

‘Thank you.’ Genji flashes a full blown smile at him. Jesse, rendered speechless, nods.

The car starts, the radio starts playing. Genji keeps his head out of the window the whole way to the base.  
-  
‘Happy Valentine’s.’ Jesse said sourly behind a pile of rubble while bullets swifted over their heads. The ninja’s head turned to him with whiplash inducing velocity, surely accompanied his eyes nearly bulging out.

‘Jesse, it did not occur to me… I’m sorry.’ He sounded so dumbfounded and disappointed with himself it broke Jesse’s heart a little.

‘Really? I thought you’d be into that kinda thing.’ McCree is genuinely surprised by that. Even more than when he was woken up at 3AM and sent to a prevent a suspected Talon operation.  
Genji chuckled and shook his head lightly. ‘Not really.’ That settles that, Jesse thought. ‘I’m, glad you think of me.’ A smile was fighting his battle poker face when he hears this. The pleased tone to it that Genji uses sometimes now makes him grit his teeth, because he can’t just start macking on his boyfriend right now.

‘When do I not?’ Genji chuckles and puts his katana next to himself in favour of holding Jesse’s hand. Jesse lifts them to kiss at Genji’s knuckles lightly.

‘I do not deserve you.’ Hana shouts for everyone to come over the comm and Genji untangles their fingers to grab for his sword.  
-  
‘Take it off.’ Jesse whispers, sitting down in the transport. He knows the blank look Genji gives him through the metal well. It made appearance not so seldom, mostly when he didn’t feel like putting up with Jesse’s nonsense. ‘Just take it off, please.’

‘I just hope you don’t expect me to suck you off now because that is not happening.’ Jesse’s expression freezes solid even though he might have well expected it.

‘Aw, I just wanted to kiss ya pretty face and you had to go and ruin the romance.’ Jesse tugged on his hand and Genji sat on hi lap. His fingers dive into the cowboys hair after he throws his face plate next to them. They get to peck each other total of three times before some others from their team arrive. They get an earful of groans and diminishing comments. Genji hides his face in Jesse’s chest as he reaches to the side and chuckles, still preferring to keep his scars hidden.

‘Jesse?’ McCree hums in acknowledgement.

‘Do you know that when you’re sappy like this your eyebrows start to quiver? It’s so ridiculous…’ Genji drapes his arms over the others back in a loose embrace

‘I’ll give you 10 seconds to shut the hell up, otherwise you can find your own seat.’ Jesse threatens lightheartedly. ‘Besides didn’t you say that me being ridiculous is why you fell for me in the first place?’

**Author's Note:**

> Do you ever start writing something and by the end it's completely different? This hot mess is exactly that.


End file.
